Enhanced Interrogation Techniques

Grzegorz Wróblewski


Tom Cruise decided only at the age of 39 to straighten his front teeth and
have them centered! People magazine named Jennifer Lopez the world's most
beautiful woman.
Mixing mushrooms with alcohol causes the skin to turn into sprayed-
with-chemicals rootworm. Do you remember the Colorado beetle?
Alas, but . . . we don't all have an hourglass figure.

An hourglass figure means wide hips, proportionally narrow waist, and
big bust. But if that doesn't happen to you,
there's no chance you'll ever wear skirts with belts or get a job
in a movie about Angelina Jolie's borderline personality disorder.
Angelina weighs 92 pounds. Two light planes with Poles on board went down.
Tom Cruise decided only at the age of 39 to straighten his front teeth and
have them centered. In 2002 during the premiere of the film Space Station
3D the actor proudly displayed his orthodontic apparatus. Now what?
A statue of Jesus King of Poland? We know the interrogation techniques used on detainees: chwyt wymuszający uwagę (attention grasp),
uderzanie przesłuchiwanym o ścianę (walling), chwyt za twarz (facial
hold), policzkowanie (facial slap or insult slap),

Remember? Angelina weighs 92 pounds.

przetrzymywanie w ciasnych
pomieszczeniach (cramped confinement), pręgierz przy ścianie
(wall standing), pręgierz zwykły (stress positions), pozbawienie snu
(sleep deprivation), wpuszczanie owadów do ciasnego miejsca odosobnienia
(insects placed in confinement box) as well as podtapianie (the waterboard).
Tom Cruise decided only at the age of 39 to straighten his front teeth and
have them centered!
Later the CIA used additional "enhanced interrogation techniques"
which included: długotrwała nagość (prolonged nudity), manipulacje żywieniowe
(dietary manipulation), uderzanie po brzuchu (abdominal slap),

Two light planes with Poles on board went down.

oblewanie
wodą (water dousing) or spryskiwanie wodą (water flicking).



translated from the Polish by Piotr Gwiazda